And another...

I've got this mate who has a filthy mind which occaisonally breaks through into reality.

One night on his walk home drunk, he's dying to drop the kids off at the pool. He's getting more and more desperate until he's only about 150 yards from his house and he can't wait any longer. Now there's this fancy designer menswear shop nearby, and as it's in the wee hours (no-one's about) he squats on their step and marks his territory (dunno if it was a class-war decision or just hi-jinks).

He then proceeds to wipe his arse on his pants, which he then posts through the shop's letterbox to be found when they openmed the following Monday.

I mean, I ask you...?

Mind you, his brother once climbed on a pub roof to shit on it...